• J Mess


If you haven't figured it out by now, I have no idea what I'm doing.

It's not at all comforting when people say "nobody knows what they're doing" about having kids. They don't come with an instruction booklet, or so I'm told. Technically I should feel better since it means I'm getting a pass on being a complete hot mess, but somebody somewhere must know what they're doing. Sadly though it's not me. I'll let you in on a little secret. Mostly I just do whatever I see my sister-in-law or mom friends doing and the internet corroborates. Seriously that's how I've gotten by thus far. I'm not exactly blazing a trail here. I'm more like the still wearing scrunchies of moms, who you feel bad having to tell that everyone is using straw sippy cups now not those silly spout ones. Those are so last decade and bad for speech development. Get with the times girlfriend.

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

After we went to my friend's house for a playgroup, I saw some cool toys she had that helped her daughter learn to sit up and a basket she used to keep all the toys contained. At that time baby toys in our house were strewn all over the living room and starting to mate with cat toys. So when we got home, I ordered the same toys and a similar basket to encourage my son to start sitting up and to organize my disaster of a house. Fast forward a couple weeks later and Nathan is sitting up like a boss and my house looks somewhat clean, and those same friends come over to our place for a playdate.

We give the quick house tour, then all convene on the floor mat to peruse the baby toys. Ohh we have an activity mat like that! Look at the bells and whistles on this jumper! We compare baby paraphernalia like luxury cars. Whoa check out the rims on that swing! Then... she sees the toys and the basket and says, "wait, are you living my life?"

Ha yes actually, I am totally Single White Mom-ing you.

But isn't that truly how we all learn? Monkey see, monkey do. Well, I am that monkey. Or rather, mom-key? And you should be honored that I've deemed your choices worthy of copying! It means you are momming hard and I am your unworthy disciple. It means you are an expert, an influencer, a leader, and I am a neophyte. It's so cold here in your shadow. Seriously, thank you for knowing enough so I can pretend I know a little too. So if you come over and I have the same Splat Mat as you, or the same pair of killer cool baby Adidas that I saw on your Facebook post, it's just because I admire your choices. And then if anyone asks, they were totally my idea. Kidding! Meanwhile, don't lie you probably got your ideas from some other mom before you. Aren't we all faking it til we make it? Just saying...

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